Friday, December 30, 2005
Who Did Know in the PMO?
Brinkmanship. Everything has to be notched up to hysteria. Every choice we make is stark - like Bruce Willis being forced to choose between his children and his wife in his next blockbuster.
Election 2004? Most important in Canadian history.
Stephen Harper? A threat to the rights and freedoms of all Canadians (2004) / Unfit for office (2005)
Election 2006? A referendum election.
Adscam? Gomery inquiry.
I mean really, when Sheila Fraser said, "broke every rule in the book", we were mad. But not white hot. That took cash transactions and car bombs; stuff that could only come from Gomery. With publication bans to boot! It was Canada's OJ Simpson trial.
So now, TrustGate has erupted in the middle of the campaign. With what? The annoucement of an investigation. No allegations. No serious evidence yet made public. No one specific focus of investigation.
Paul Martin and Ralph Goodale come to the decision that since Mr. Goodale is not under CRIMINAL investigation, he will stay on as Minister of Finance. I agree with them on that point entirely, but it still doesn't mask the clumsy and foolish handling of this issue from the get-go. And, the clumsy foolishness is so serious, it wouldn't hurt to toss in a resignation for balance.
This isn't jail. It's not even "common people" living. What's the problem?
Instead, the Liberals reaction only made people suspicious that Grit spinsters were pointing everyone to Goodale and Finance to divert away from the PMO. So when forced to answer questions about "who did know in the PMO?", the PM has no pretty ways to answer that question. Up a notch? Up 100 notches!
If he had resigned, the focus would have remained on finance. Ultimately he would be vindicated and his good name restored. (Mostly, because his could name has not really suffered from this).
Election 2004? Most important in Canadian history.
Stephen Harper? A threat to the rights and freedoms of all Canadians (2004) / Unfit for office (2005)
Election 2006? A referendum election.
Adscam? Gomery inquiry.
I mean really, when Sheila Fraser said, "broke every rule in the book", we were mad. But not white hot. That took cash transactions and car bombs; stuff that could only come from Gomery. With publication bans to boot! It was Canada's OJ Simpson trial.
So now, TrustGate has erupted in the middle of the campaign. With what? The annoucement of an investigation. No allegations. No serious evidence yet made public. No one specific focus of investigation.
Paul Martin and Ralph Goodale come to the decision that since Mr. Goodale is not under CRIMINAL investigation, he will stay on as Minister of Finance. I agree with them on that point entirely, but it still doesn't mask the clumsy and foolish handling of this issue from the get-go. And, the clumsy foolishness is so serious, it wouldn't hurt to toss in a resignation for balance.
This isn't jail. It's not even "common people" living. What's the problem?
Instead, the Liberals reaction only made people suspicious that Grit spinsters were pointing everyone to Goodale and Finance to divert away from the PMO. So when forced to answer questions about "who did know in the PMO?", the PM has no pretty ways to answer that question. Up a notch? Up 100 notches!
If he had resigned, the focus would have remained on finance. Ultimately he would be vindicated and his good name restored. (Mostly, because his could name has not really suffered from this).
Thursday, December 29, 2005
Even the Trees are Exhausted
The island of Montreal carries with it a thin but heavy film of ice. Gentle rain has accumulated to the point where everything aches beneath its burden. Branches are swaying in the wind and crackle as the ice chips and flakes away. It sounds like old men and old spines trying to do the gymnastics of a younger time.
If you are a tree-whisperer, as I am, you would know that they are telling us one thing:
Dump Martin. Drop the Grits like concrete boots in the Lachine Canal. They make tree-rot look fun.
If you are a tree-whisperer, as I am, you would know that they are telling us one thing:
Dump Martin. Drop the Grits like concrete boots in the Lachine Canal. They make tree-rot look fun.
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
Goodale Remains, even if he loses his seat....
The RCMP, the only government outfit working this week, annouces it is investigating the government for potential criminal wrong-doing in the income trust annoucement. In a nutshell, the possibility is someone leaked the tax rule changes to the benefit of a few Bay Street folks prior to the annoucement. Its Martha Stewart style insider trading. Only the people involved aren't as important as a celebrity like her so happily the news gets dropped while we are busy renting movies.
Now. Before anyone gets carried away, this is just the annoucement of an investigation. One asks, will this help or hinder the Liberals? Answer: oh, it helps - big time. Scandal fatigue has all sorts of lovely consequences no stranger than those of quantum mechanics. Every chance that Tory attempts to mention it will look like scandal-mongering. Lots of Scott Brison looking shocked saying, "the investigation has just begun. This is more Tory smears. Let the investigation takes its course and let's decide when the results are in."
People buy that crap. Believe me. Did you see the new Star Wars movies? Those did boffo at the box office in spite of the fact that they were bitter pablum.
Liberals dangle out, "what's a few million compared to [hot-button issue of the day]". They shrug their shoulders sympathetically. Maybe you want to forgive those charming scamps - its Christmas afterall! Well, here's a fun game:
Saying, "what's a few million?" once costs a few million.
Saying it ten times costs 10 - 30 million.
Saying it 1,000 times costs $1billion +.
How many shrugs does it take to break a camel's back?
The Liberals will prance around the issue like a bunch of private school girls at their first co-ed dance -flitting glances, fleeting rubs. They will be shocked that anyone would even imagine that something untoward could happen. Remember: they banished the 10 Bad Liberals from their party, forever. If anything, this unfortunate investigation should annul the election since it would be unfair to have such a vote with the Liberals under this cloud.
Meanwhile, they will remind us that their opponents are cannibals and zealots.
UPDATE:
Paul Martin did his best Patsy C. with a worbly rendition of "Stand by Your Man." Goodale has nothing to do with any potential leak. Trust the PMO on this one: any potential leak did not come from Finance....
Now. Before anyone gets carried away, this is just the annoucement of an investigation. One asks, will this help or hinder the Liberals? Answer: oh, it helps - big time. Scandal fatigue has all sorts of lovely consequences no stranger than those of quantum mechanics. Every chance that Tory attempts to mention it will look like scandal-mongering. Lots of Scott Brison looking shocked saying, "the investigation has just begun. This is more Tory smears. Let the investigation takes its course and let's decide when the results are in."
People buy that crap. Believe me. Did you see the new Star Wars movies? Those did boffo at the box office in spite of the fact that they were bitter pablum.
Liberals dangle out, "what's a few million compared to [hot-button issue of the day]". They shrug their shoulders sympathetically. Maybe you want to forgive those charming scamps - its Christmas afterall! Well, here's a fun game:
Saying, "what's a few million?" once costs a few million.
Saying it ten times costs 10 - 30 million.
Saying it 1,000 times costs $1billion +.
How many shrugs does it take to break a camel's back?
The Liberals will prance around the issue like a bunch of private school girls at their first co-ed dance -flitting glances, fleeting rubs. They will be shocked that anyone would even imagine that something untoward could happen. Remember: they banished the 10 Bad Liberals from their party, forever. If anything, this unfortunate investigation should annul the election since it would be unfair to have such a vote with the Liberals under this cloud.
Meanwhile, they will remind us that their opponents are cannibals and zealots.
UPDATE:
Paul Martin did his best Patsy C. with a worbly rendition of "Stand by Your Man." Goodale has nothing to do with any potential leak. Trust the PMO on this one: any potential leak did not come from Finance....
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Klander: Still Meets the Test for PM Material
By now, you've all read the news of a big-wig Liberal in Ontario who resigned over the offensive content he generated for his blog.
The most repulsive content was a pair of photos in which Jack Layton's wife, NDP Candidate Olivia Chow is compared to a chow chow - ostensibly for the same last name and, as a punchline, the same slanty-eyes.
Do you think this is a one off? Last spring, Reg Alcock joked he would prefer someone "higher up the gene pool" than Inky Mark in his party. (Mark has Asian roots).
Liberal humour knows two kinds:
1) the syrupy confections of Scott "Aw! Shucks!" Feshucks whose material can only be described as the stuff left on Seinfeld's cutting room floors.
2) Not funny. Just raw and mean, vicious and personal. Profane in the deepest meaning of the word.
Meanwhile, the Liberals say, "Klander worked for diversity." (Codespeak for: he got more Liberal-friendlies into cushy government jobs.)
The important thing: Klander knows the Charter of Rights as developed and defined by the Supreme Court is primal.
God himself could not disrupt Canada from implementing a Supreme Court decision on a Charter Issue. Sorry God, that ain't the way it's going to work. And if you don't like it God - go move south with those Yankee-Satanists!
That's right, Klander can beat Scott Reid and John Duffy combined at an "insult as many groups in one election as you can", but according to Paulie, he's still Prime Ministerial material.
The most repulsive content was a pair of photos in which Jack Layton's wife, NDP Candidate Olivia Chow is compared to a chow chow - ostensibly for the same last name and, as a punchline, the same slanty-eyes.
Do you think this is a one off? Last spring, Reg Alcock joked he would prefer someone "higher up the gene pool" than Inky Mark in his party. (Mark has Asian roots).
Liberal humour knows two kinds:
1) the syrupy confections of Scott "Aw! Shucks!" Feshucks whose material can only be described as the stuff left on Seinfeld's cutting room floors.
2) Not funny. Just raw and mean, vicious and personal. Profane in the deepest meaning of the word.
Meanwhile, the Liberals say, "Klander worked for diversity." (Codespeak for: he got more Liberal-friendlies into cushy government jobs.)
The important thing: Klander knows the Charter of Rights as developed and defined by the Supreme Court is primal.
God himself could not disrupt Canada from implementing a Supreme Court decision on a Charter Issue. Sorry God, that ain't the way it's going to work. And if you don't like it God - go move south with those Yankee-Satanists!
That's right, Klander can beat Scott Reid and John Duffy combined at an "insult as many groups in one election as you can", but according to Paulie, he's still Prime Ministerial material.
William Shatner - DemiGod
Am I making assumptions if I call you a fan of William Shatner?
If you are my parents age and you think, "Montreal Icons" - likely Leonard Cohen or Mordichai Richler come to mind. If you a young or semi-young hipster, you might be thinking Rufus Wainright or Arcade Fire.
But if you fit in that tiny slice of demographic that David Foote calls "the bust generation" then William Shatner may be top of mind here. (Or Luba. Luba is a close seond).
Star Trek goes wihtout saying. Regular readers of Chuckercanuck could probably pick up on the fact that I would rather serve Captain Picard rather than Captain Kirk - William Shatner is still responsible for some of the finest science fiction acting ever.
I remind you: Shatner stares intently at the space viewer, knowing a cloaked and armed Klingon vessal waits to attack. Using Spock's brains, Shatner concocts a plan of attack which he know waits with bated breath to unleash. His foot rests on his Captain's chair, his elbow on his knee. His hand curls slightly towards a fist.
"Fire!" He shouts with epic authority.
Wow. It doesn't get better than that - except maybe, "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn."
Shatner's appearances on Saturday Night Live are some of the best, including his dressing down of a Trekkie at a Trekkie convention: "You son, have you ever kissed a girl?"
All this, because Santa dropped William Shatner's new CD into my wife's stocking. Its Bob Dylan meets Brian Wilson.
If you are my parents age and you think, "Montreal Icons" - likely Leonard Cohen or Mordichai Richler come to mind. If you a young or semi-young hipster, you might be thinking Rufus Wainright or Arcade Fire.
But if you fit in that tiny slice of demographic that David Foote calls "the bust generation" then William Shatner may be top of mind here. (Or Luba. Luba is a close seond).
Star Trek goes wihtout saying. Regular readers of Chuckercanuck could probably pick up on the fact that I would rather serve Captain Picard rather than Captain Kirk - William Shatner is still responsible for some of the finest science fiction acting ever.
I remind you: Shatner stares intently at the space viewer, knowing a cloaked and armed Klingon vessal waits to attack. Using Spock's brains, Shatner concocts a plan of attack which he know waits with bated breath to unleash. His foot rests on his Captain's chair, his elbow on his knee. His hand curls slightly towards a fist.
"Fire!" He shouts with epic authority.
Wow. It doesn't get better than that - except maybe, "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn."
Shatner's appearances on Saturday Night Live are some of the best, including his dressing down of a Trekkie at a Trekkie convention: "You son, have you ever kissed a girl?"
All this, because Santa dropped William Shatner's new CD into my wife's stocking. Its Bob Dylan meets Brian Wilson.
Friday, December 23, 2005
Grits See Opportunity in Holocaust Memorial
Iran's Mullahs would tell you that Iran is a democracy they've mastered. Canada's Liberals would describe Canada as a democracy they've mastered.
Iran's Mullahs would tell you that America is the "Great Satan". Canada's Liberals would tell you that the majority of Americans elected the "Great Satan".
Iran's Mullahs are never shy to vote for an anti-Israel motion at the "democratic" United Nations. Canada's Liberals are rarely shy to vote for an anti-Israel motion at the "democratic" United Nations.
Now, we find out Liberals are using pictures from a Holocaust memorial as campaign materials. Not nearly is frightening as the Mullah mentality, but still disturbingly callous. Shades of sleazy, too.
Canada, are we stuck on stupid?
Iran's Mullahs would tell you that America is the "Great Satan". Canada's Liberals would tell you that the majority of Americans elected the "Great Satan".
Iran's Mullahs are never shy to vote for an anti-Israel motion at the "democratic" United Nations. Canada's Liberals are rarely shy to vote for an anti-Israel motion at the "democratic" United Nations.
Now, we find out Liberals are using pictures from a Holocaust memorial as campaign materials. Not nearly is frightening as the Mullah mentality, but still disturbingly callous. Shades of sleazy, too.
Canada, are we stuck on stupid?
Merry Christmas
Chuckercanuck shuts down for Christmas.
Mr. Harper - please get back to work on boxing day. While Martin is busy oogling "strangers" wives, you remind the frenzied shoppers about the GST pleadge.
Merry Christmas to everyone, maybe, especially, Don and Candace.
The animosity between those two fine Canadians reminds this young Canuck of Maddy and Dave on Moonlighting. Except, Candace would be the level-headed, conservative Bruce Willis and Don would be more scatter-brained and mushy like Cybil Shephard.
Mr. Harper - please get back to work on boxing day. While Martin is busy oogling "strangers" wives, you remind the frenzied shoppers about the GST pleadge.
Merry Christmas to everyone, maybe, especially, Don and Candace.
The animosity between those two fine Canadians reminds this young Canuck of Maddy and Dave on Moonlighting. Except, Candace would be the level-headed, conservative Bruce Willis and Don would be more scatter-brained and mushy like Cybil Shephard.
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
Mattresses & Condoms & The Right to Swing
Today is a magnificent day in the life of our Charter. Perhaps its single biggest test. Perhaps its single biggest achievement. The Supreme Court of Canada affirmed the right of citizens to swing.
Swing? Delicate readers should read no further. Swinging is group sex. Swinging clubs are bars with various rooms for consenting adults to have semi-varied group sex with strangers. Sometimes, they serve a meal with the price of admission.
Of late, in the heat of electoral fever, the wondrous bestowments on the land produced by a mix of Charter and Supreme Court judges have been opportunities for soaring rhetoric. Talk of weeping or dewy-eyed dream-talk at least.
Well tonight, I join my Liberal and NDP friends in sharing a joyous cry over another right affirmed, another barrier struck down.
In fact, my post-January 23rd fantasy goes like this:
Tories win a minority.
Eager to enshrine a Court/Charter defined right, the Liberals introduce legislation to protect swinging and swing clubs on their first opposition day.
NDP, Bloc , Liberals vote in favour. Swinging is undeniably legal - protected, even. A nice non-confidence victory for the opposition.
Tories get childcare bill passed.
Chuckercanuck gets his $2,400. And, if they can time it with the end of tax season, maybe they'll shoot for $3,600.
Chuckercanuck takes that money and invests it in a small business which benefits from Tory tax plans as well.
With $2,400, Chuckercanuck lines his basement with plastic sheets and padding; gets a good sound system downstairs; a liquor license - eh, voila: "Centre de Swing - West Island" is born.
Swing? Delicate readers should read no further. Swinging is group sex. Swinging clubs are bars with various rooms for consenting adults to have semi-varied group sex with strangers. Sometimes, they serve a meal with the price of admission.
Of late, in the heat of electoral fever, the wondrous bestowments on the land produced by a mix of Charter and Supreme Court judges have been opportunities for soaring rhetoric. Talk of weeping or dewy-eyed dream-talk at least.
Well tonight, I join my Liberal and NDP friends in sharing a joyous cry over another right affirmed, another barrier struck down.
In fact, my post-January 23rd fantasy goes like this:
Tories win a minority.
Eager to enshrine a Court/Charter defined right, the Liberals introduce legislation to protect swinging and swing clubs on their first opposition day.
NDP, Bloc , Liberals vote in favour. Swinging is undeniably legal - protected, even. A nice non-confidence victory for the opposition.
Tories get childcare bill passed.
Chuckercanuck gets his $2,400. And, if they can time it with the end of tax season, maybe they'll shoot for $3,600.
Chuckercanuck takes that money and invests it in a small business which benefits from Tory tax plans as well.
With $2,400, Chuckercanuck lines his basement with plastic sheets and padding; gets a good sound system downstairs; a liquor license - eh, voila: "Centre de Swing - West Island" is born.
"Paul Martin's Liberals - Les Liberaux de Paul Martin"
That's what they have printed on their campaign signs.
Oh great and noble reader of keen intellect and exquisite taste, please explain:
How can you say the Liberals are all one big united happy loving team, but deliberately exclude the faction that remained fairly loyal to the ancienne regime.
I tell you one thing: I'm glad the Shitte and Kurds have, for the time, decided not to take "Paul Martin's Liberals" approach to nation re-branding for Iraq. I'm not so sure we'd end up with little more than a few pissy blogs and a hair's more cynicism among the citenzry.
I take my leave - there's Martha's show to see through to the conclusion and Peter wants to tell me what happened today.
Perhaps later, I tell you why I think Toronto's water has turned Andrew Coyne crazy.
Oh great and noble reader of keen intellect and exquisite taste, please explain:
How can you say the Liberals are all one big united happy loving team, but deliberately exclude the faction that remained fairly loyal to the ancienne regime.
I tell you one thing: I'm glad the Shitte and Kurds have, for the time, decided not to take "Paul Martin's Liberals" approach to nation re-branding for Iraq. I'm not so sure we'd end up with little more than a few pissy blogs and a hair's more cynicism among the citenzry.
I take my leave - there's Martha's show to see through to the conclusion and Peter wants to tell me what happened today.
Perhaps later, I tell you why I think Toronto's water has turned Andrew Coyne crazy.
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
CBCs National Weathergirl
Okay, just curious: there isn't a single weather person in all of Canada that the CBC can hire?
Why can't our new national weather forecaster sound - you know, Canadian.
Claire Martin is probably a lovely person - cloying and too cute by half on television - but she sounds like she just landed from Melbourne. When I hear that aussie accent, I think: "hey, what is this? Am I renting skis at Lake Louise?"
Also - her map is the ugliest thing I've ever seen.
Why can't our new national weather forecaster sound - you know, Canadian.
Claire Martin is probably a lovely person - cloying and too cute by half on television - but she sounds like she just landed from Melbourne. When I hear that aussie accent, I think: "hey, what is this? Am I renting skis at Lake Louise?"
Also - her map is the ugliest thing I've ever seen.
Its all about timing...
Paul Martin dreams of solving the Quebec constitutional dilemma with the same force and verve he tackled western alienation. (Promise made – promise delivered, eh .)
The problem is only one of timing. See, now just isn’t the best time for him.
First, he has spa treatments at 3 pm to counter the sagging look he’s taken on since the writ was dropped.
Then, he has a major confab with Khaddafy to go over the really big issues of the day. Turns out, Khaddafy has a global conscience unlike Bush-Satan and the mass of fat Americans driving their Ontario-made SUVs.
Finally, he’s co-writing a sketch with Rick Mercer for next year’s tulip festival in Ottawa: win or lose, he’s there.
So you see, he’s really, really to busy. But he its on his list. There’s a post-it note on the fridge next to “don’t forget to stock up on Liberian flags”.
Besides, who has an appetite for nation-building over the holidays? It boggles the mind that Darth Harper would suggest something so completely insane at this juncture. Hello?
The problem is only one of timing. See, now just isn’t the best time for him.
First, he has spa treatments at 3 pm to counter the sagging look he’s taken on since the writ was dropped.
Then, he has a major confab with Khaddafy to go over the really big issues of the day. Turns out, Khaddafy has a global conscience unlike Bush-Satan and the mass of fat Americans driving their Ontario-made SUVs.
Finally, he’s co-writing a sketch with Rick Mercer for next year’s tulip festival in Ottawa: win or lose, he’s there.
So you see, he’s really, really to busy. But he its on his list. There’s a post-it note on the fridge next to “don’t forget to stock up on Liberian flags”.
Besides, who has an appetite for nation-building over the holidays? It boggles the mind that Darth Harper would suggest something so completely insane at this juncture. Hello?
Monday, December 19, 2005
From Alberta, With Love
Mr. Harper released his Quebec platform today. Tonight, a hundred jaded pundits will fall asleep with the strange flutter of hope tickling them awake.
As the news percolates through Quebec, it will jar the soft nationalist ear because they expect the cloying, infantilized "passion" of the Liberal Party. Suddenly, a federalist voice takes a fresh, accomodating stand towards Quebec. Oui, madame, on est ici pour vous servir.
Everytime Duceppe says "fiscal imbalance", he is campaigning for Stephen Harper.
Paul Martin responds with some poor photocopy of Trudeau's: "The federal government will not be headwaiter to the provinces".
To which Mr. Harper offers, "No. The federal government will be headwaiter to the citizens."
Then, it is his duty to go for the kill. Assymetrical federalism is an acid rot on confederation and must be rmoved. Side-deals timed for maximum political advantage regardless of the long-term merits become the standard operating procedure.
Clarity must prevail. Not just in ending the country, but in running the country.
As the news percolates through Quebec, it will jar the soft nationalist ear because they expect the cloying, infantilized "passion" of the Liberal Party. Suddenly, a federalist voice takes a fresh, accomodating stand towards Quebec. Oui, madame, on est ici pour vous servir.
Everytime Duceppe says "fiscal imbalance", he is campaigning for Stephen Harper.
Paul Martin responds with some poor photocopy of Trudeau's: "The federal government will not be headwaiter to the provinces".
To which Mr. Harper offers, "No. The federal government will be headwaiter to the citizens."
Then, it is his duty to go for the kill. Assymetrical federalism is an acid rot on confederation and must be rmoved. Side-deals timed for maximum political advantage regardless of the long-term merits become the standard operating procedure.
Clarity must prevail. Not just in ending the country, but in running the country.
Sunday, December 18, 2005
Liberals: You Want Change? I'll Show you Change.
The new Liberal talking points are that Canadians hunger for significant change - just ask their big enchilada, as that's been his big point today.
The Prime Minister argues that only a 5th consecutive mandate for the Liberals will deliver that change. (Nope, I don't make this up. )
In order to prove his sincerity in making sweeping change, he has called for an immediate cabinet shuffle. I don't have the whole list, so here's what I found so far:
Ralph Goodale - Public Works
Bill Graham - Foreign Affairs
Stephane Dion - Intergovernmental relations
Lucienne Robbillard - Treasury Board
David Anderson - Environment
John MacCallum - Defense
Pierre Pettigrew - International Trade
Anne McLelland - Justice
Belinda Stronach - new, expanded position: People's Ministry of the Democratic Worker's Revolution
The Grit war room is billing this as proof positive that Martin means change and Martin delivers. Its a whole new face to the Liberal Cabinet.
There's only one way to change: stay the course. Almost Kierkegaardian.
The Prime Minister argues that only a 5th consecutive mandate for the Liberals will deliver that change. (Nope, I don't make this up. )
In order to prove his sincerity in making sweeping change, he has called for an immediate cabinet shuffle. I don't have the whole list, so here's what I found so far:
Ralph Goodale - Public Works
Bill Graham - Foreign Affairs
Stephane Dion - Intergovernmental relations
Lucienne Robbillard - Treasury Board
David Anderson - Environment
John MacCallum - Defense
Pierre Pettigrew - International Trade
Anne McLelland - Justice
Belinda Stronach - new, expanded position: People's Ministry of the Democratic Worker's Revolution
The Grit war room is billing this as proof positive that Martin means change and Martin delivers. Its a whole new face to the Liberal Cabinet.
There's only one way to change: stay the course. Almost Kierkegaardian.
How green the NDP?
Spotted in the riding of NDG-Lachine by Chuckercanuck's brilliant and beautiful better-half:
NDP activists putting up signs on the telephone polls of Dorval, Quebec.
Small detail - these Kyoto-concerned Canucks left their van to idle while they fastened signs.
Not surprised, fellow Tories? No. I suppose not.
NDP activists putting up signs on the telephone polls of Dorval, Quebec.
Small detail - these Kyoto-concerned Canucks left their van to idle while they fastened signs.
Not surprised, fellow Tories? No. I suppose not.
Mr. Harper - You are Unfit to Govern
Dear Mr. Harper,
I write with profound regret. As the original Quebec Harpermaniac, I have been steadfast and loyal for years, but the Prime Minister has made an air-tight case against you:
You are unfit to govern because you don't support the charter*.
The Prime Minister will defend the charter to the death, if necessary, and this is the duty of all Prime Ministers.
Proof: When the Supreme Court ruled that Canada's public health system was in violation of the Charter of Rights and Freedoms - the Prime Mininster did nothing.
That's right. He did nothing. He did it boldly. Bravely. Calmly in the face of a thousand terrors, he ignored the ruling. Now, he doesn't talk about it much. Silence proves his energetic defense of charter rights.
And you? You want a free vote on the definition of mariage, as the supreme court left Parliament to do? For shame! How do you sleep at night?
This is why I support the idea that Prime Ministers should approve PM candidates in advance of elections and only approved candidates should be on the ballot.
I will admit, it is curious that the Prime Minister raises this argument now.
First, it's rather early in the election to throw this kind of nuclear assessment of your opponent. Better drop that kind of daisy-cutter a couple of days before the vote. Myself, I will likely be blind drunk about five times up to the new year. That's plenty of time to forgive and forget.
Second, it confirms the impression regular folk had coming out of the debates:
Harper has the royal jelly, and the Liberals know it.
I write with profound regret. As the original Quebec Harpermaniac, I have been steadfast and loyal for years, but the Prime Minister has made an air-tight case against you:
You are unfit to govern because you don't support the charter*.
The Prime Minister will defend the charter to the death, if necessary, and this is the duty of all Prime Ministers.
Proof: When the Supreme Court ruled that Canada's public health system was in violation of the Charter of Rights and Freedoms - the Prime Mininster did nothing.
That's right. He did nothing. He did it boldly. Bravely. Calmly in the face of a thousand terrors, he ignored the ruling. Now, he doesn't talk about it much. Silence proves his energetic defense of charter rights.
And you? You want a free vote on the definition of mariage, as the supreme court left Parliament to do? For shame! How do you sleep at night?
This is why I support the idea that Prime Ministers should approve PM candidates in advance of elections and only approved candidates should be on the ballot.
I will admit, it is curious that the Prime Minister raises this argument now.
First, it's rather early in the election to throw this kind of nuclear assessment of your opponent. Better drop that kind of daisy-cutter a couple of days before the vote. Myself, I will likely be blind drunk about five times up to the new year. That's plenty of time to forgive and forget.
Second, it confirms the impression regular folk had coming out of the debates:
Harper has the royal jelly, and the Liberals know it.
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
Overheard at the White House
Condi and W are sitting in the oval office. W isn't quite sure why she's here again - third time today.
Condi: Mr. President, its about these elections.
W: Condi, really? This would be our third meeting today on Iraq's elections.
Condi: No, sir, the other elections.
W: Afghanistan? (she shakes her head) Ghana? (she shakes her head) Poland? (she shakes her head) New Jersey?
Condi: No, Canada. I want to talk about the Canadian elections!
W: They got themselves elections, do they? Who they electing up there? Is it for the senate?
Condi: No, the prime minister appoints the senate.
W: Dang! You kiddin'? He picks the folks that approve his supreme court nominations?
Condi: No, the prime minister doesn't need his supreme court picks approved.
W: This is crazy. So, they electing their head of state?
Condi: No, that's the prime mininster's appointment.
W: Who they electing then?
Condi: Well, the prime minister.
W: I thought he takes over by coup?
Condi: He did.
W: I liked the other guy, Creteen from Queerbeck. He told funny jokes. This new guy - Mr. Coup - he ain't so much fun.
Condi: From a national interest perspective, we want the prime minister to win re-election.
W: We do? Ah, crap. Ain't they got a conservative party up there in Canada?
Condi: Sort of. The Conservatives were in favour of same sex civil unions and supported by the NRA.
W: Sounds like Howard Dean.
Condi: Exactly.
W: Still, I'd take Dean over Ted Kennedy anyday. And the guy who stuck it to Creteen smells like Ted Kennydey to me - and I'm talking before his three-tini lunch.
Condi: Yeah, but if the Conservatives win, there's going to be a rapprochement.
W: Say what? Rappro-what? I don't speak surrender monkey. Talk to a Texan.
Condi: They'll want concessions for making nice.
W: Lumber, beef.
Condi: If the prime minister stays, its steady sailing.
W: Sold. How do I help get the prime minister elected?
Condi: Oh, that's easy........
Condi: Mr. President, its about these elections.
W: Condi, really? This would be our third meeting today on Iraq's elections.
Condi: No, sir, the other elections.
W: Afghanistan? (she shakes her head) Ghana? (she shakes her head) Poland? (she shakes her head) New Jersey?
Condi: No, Canada. I want to talk about the Canadian elections!
W: They got themselves elections, do they? Who they electing up there? Is it for the senate?
Condi: No, the prime minister appoints the senate.
W: Dang! You kiddin'? He picks the folks that approve his supreme court nominations?
Condi: No, the prime minister doesn't need his supreme court picks approved.
W: This is crazy. So, they electing their head of state?
Condi: No, that's the prime mininster's appointment.
W: Who they electing then?
Condi: Well, the prime minister.
W: I thought he takes over by coup?
Condi: He did.
W: I liked the other guy, Creteen from Queerbeck. He told funny jokes. This new guy - Mr. Coup - he ain't so much fun.
Condi: From a national interest perspective, we want the prime minister to win re-election.
W: We do? Ah, crap. Ain't they got a conservative party up there in Canada?
Condi: Sort of. The Conservatives were in favour of same sex civil unions and supported by the NRA.
W: Sounds like Howard Dean.
Condi: Exactly.
W: Still, I'd take Dean over Ted Kennedy anyday. And the guy who stuck it to Creteen smells like Ted Kennydey to me - and I'm talking before his three-tini lunch.
Condi: Yeah, but if the Conservatives win, there's going to be a rapprochement.
W: Say what? Rappro-what? I don't speak surrender monkey. Talk to a Texan.
Condi: They'll want concessions for making nice.
W: Lumber, beef.
Condi: If the prime minister stays, its steady sailing.
W: Sold. How do I help get the prime minister elected?
Condi: Oh, that's easy........
Decoding Duffy
Response to John Duffy's "Decoding Harper" in today's National Post. If you don't read it in the letters tomorrow, you have it here:
The dour and angry-looking John Duffy tells us that Mr. Harper offers no guarantees when it comes to a woman’s right to choose. In his speech to the policy convention this spring, Mr. Harper offered exactly that guarantee: so long as he leads the Conservative Party, the party will protect a woman’s right to choose.
The stomach-turning irony in this trumped-up assassination of Mr. Harper is this : the only choice Liberals are prepared to grant women when it comes to their children is whether to abort or not. Once a woman makes that decision, then all further decisions should be made by more competent authorities in Ottawa.
The dour and angry-looking John Duffy tells us that Mr. Harper offers no guarantees when it comes to a woman’s right to choose. In his speech to the policy convention this spring, Mr. Harper offered exactly that guarantee: so long as he leads the Conservative Party, the party will protect a woman’s right to choose.
The stomach-turning irony in this trumped-up assassination of Mr. Harper is this : the only choice Liberals are prepared to grant women when it comes to their children is whether to abort or not. Once a woman makes that decision, then all further decisions should be made by more competent authorities in Ottawa.
Sunday, December 11, 2005
Beer and Popcorn
Scott Reid, communications director for the PMO, said that if you give parents with young children direct support for their childcare needs, they will spend it on beer and popcorn. That is why the government needs to spend it for us.
Scott, here's one daddy of two daughters (3 yrs & 8 mths) who stands with you. These two little girls of mine are something like giant parasites. Tape worms are one thing - you hardly notice their mooching. But little children are constantly demanding food, wiping, diaper changes & bathroom breaks, attention - uggh, affection. They really get in the way of a man trying to have a good time.
I work very hard and the government stuffs a good part of my income into brown envelopes of their choice. Any cent of that money you return - whether in tax cuts or finding a program to sponsor me with - ain't going to bloddsuckers no. 2 in my life: my children. Its going to me.
With $1200 from Harper, I'd blow it on beer and popcorn - just like Scott said. But he forgot to mention lap dances. I'd bet most daddy's would go out and spend it on lap dances. Thankfully, the Liberals drafted sufficient lap dancers from foreign locales to ensure supply keeps up with this tax-cut fuelled increase in demand.
So, if you don't approve of lap dancing, don't support Harper's childcare plan.
You know, my big worry is both parties are offering a tax cut. The question is, can I really be trusted with a tax cut? As I explore what I'd do with the money, I realize how dangerous a tax cut really is.
If you give an average Joe like me a tax cut - we're going to blow it on cubans and tequila - to be sure. But us daddy's - flush with the lap dance thrill from the child care money - would go one step further. Give us tax cuts and we'll be doing a "white" Christmas, Boisclair style.
With $1,200 - I'd fill up my car and time how long it takes to go empty while idling. If you care for the planet, you'd be against Harper's childcare plan.
Seriously, disposal income generally is an evil thing. Paul Martin can spend money wisely. But me? Not a chance. So, I have modest proposal:
Tax `100% of my income. Assign my family a house. Deliver groceries of your chosing based on a menu set by you (Scotty Brison could do that up nice). Offer me television - public broadcasting of course. Take the choices out of my hands. My moral compass is shrivelled and I live from cheap thrill to cheap thrill. I cannot do it. Only you Lord Magna of Steamship Greatness.
Scott, here's one daddy of two daughters (3 yrs & 8 mths) who stands with you. These two little girls of mine are something like giant parasites. Tape worms are one thing - you hardly notice their mooching. But little children are constantly demanding food, wiping, diaper changes & bathroom breaks, attention - uggh, affection. They really get in the way of a man trying to have a good time.
I work very hard and the government stuffs a good part of my income into brown envelopes of their choice. Any cent of that money you return - whether in tax cuts or finding a program to sponsor me with - ain't going to bloddsuckers no. 2 in my life: my children. Its going to me.
With $1200 from Harper, I'd blow it on beer and popcorn - just like Scott said. But he forgot to mention lap dances. I'd bet most daddy's would go out and spend it on lap dances. Thankfully, the Liberals drafted sufficient lap dancers from foreign locales to ensure supply keeps up with this tax-cut fuelled increase in demand.
So, if you don't approve of lap dancing, don't support Harper's childcare plan.
You know, my big worry is both parties are offering a tax cut. The question is, can I really be trusted with a tax cut? As I explore what I'd do with the money, I realize how dangerous a tax cut really is.
If you give an average Joe like me a tax cut - we're going to blow it on cubans and tequila - to be sure. But us daddy's - flush with the lap dance thrill from the child care money - would go one step further. Give us tax cuts and we'll be doing a "white" Christmas, Boisclair style.
With $1,200 - I'd fill up my car and time how long it takes to go empty while idling. If you care for the planet, you'd be against Harper's childcare plan.
Seriously, disposal income generally is an evil thing. Paul Martin can spend money wisely. But me? Not a chance. So, I have modest proposal:
Tax `100% of my income. Assign my family a house. Deliver groceries of your chosing based on a menu set by you (Scotty Brison could do that up nice). Offer me television - public broadcasting of course. Take the choices out of my hands. My moral compass is shrivelled and I live from cheap thrill to cheap thrill. I cannot do it. Only you Lord Magna of Steamship Greatness.
Saturday, December 10, 2005
Just Askin'
Bill says he was surprised by Belinda's defection but once he spoke to her, he understood it a principled move...
Somehow, I think Hillary would be a little off-message on this one...
Somehow, I think Hillary would be a little off-message on this one...
Thursday, December 08, 2005
Children - Worth Getting Mad About
A good chunk of national politics can be handled with a chuckle even if you lose the debate. Few issues rile the average Canucker to anger. I am no different, shrugging off the loopiness that governs our lives on most days.
Corruption gets me mad. Adscam makes me mad. The income trust story makes me mad - but that's only the whiff still missing a rotting fish. But this stuff happens. Will happen. Its very human.
Quebec separation makes me mad. Also, its corrosive twin: Canadian nationalism. These two bone-waisting ailments make the country weaker by the minute. (Note to cosmopolitan Iggy: the Liberals embody the nationalistic lustings that you claim to abhor.
Liberal Daycare Systems make me mad. I am mad for two reasons.
--> Both Harper and Martin will invest the same monies. With Harper, my money supports my children and my neighbour's children. Wtih Martin, my money supports my neighbour's children only. No one, from Martin down in the grits, has explained to me what my children did to be worthless?
--> The money you claim to be spending is entirely insufficient to fund a quality daycare system. Your plan covers half the number of children that Harper's does. So you're spending $10 per day per child on daycare costs. That doesn't come close to covering the actual, full costs of daycare. You'd need to find, AT LEAST, another $15 per child per day. So, $7 from the parents. $8 from the provinces. That's a recipe for disaster over the long-term. You need to commit the full $18 per child per day to credit yourself with delivering on this promise.
I don't think we'll get quality daycare out of the Liberals. Meantime, they are shafting my daughters. And the parents vocally supporting Martin's plan are wresting money from my daughters to hand to their children.
No matter who this issue resolves during this election, it will not be over here.
Corruption gets me mad. Adscam makes me mad. The income trust story makes me mad - but that's only the whiff still missing a rotting fish. But this stuff happens. Will happen. Its very human.
Quebec separation makes me mad. Also, its corrosive twin: Canadian nationalism. These two bone-waisting ailments make the country weaker by the minute. (Note to cosmopolitan Iggy: the Liberals embody the nationalistic lustings that you claim to abhor.
Liberal Daycare Systems make me mad. I am mad for two reasons.
--> Both Harper and Martin will invest the same monies. With Harper, my money supports my children and my neighbour's children. Wtih Martin, my money supports my neighbour's children only. No one, from Martin down in the grits, has explained to me what my children did to be worthless?
--> The money you claim to be spending is entirely insufficient to fund a quality daycare system. Your plan covers half the number of children that Harper's does. So you're spending $10 per day per child on daycare costs. That doesn't come close to covering the actual, full costs of daycare. You'd need to find, AT LEAST, another $15 per child per day. So, $7 from the parents. $8 from the provinces. That's a recipe for disaster over the long-term. You need to commit the full $18 per child per day to credit yourself with delivering on this promise.
I don't think we'll get quality daycare out of the Liberals. Meantime, they are shafting my daughters. And the parents vocally supporting Martin's plan are wresting money from my daughters to hand to their children.
No matter who this issue resolves during this election, it will not be over here.
Wednesday, December 07, 2005
GST at the Corner Store (Depanneur here in Quebec)
Do me a favour:
Frequent a few local corner stores. Purchase something - a pack of gum. See if they actually punch the pre-GST price in and let the register calculate the GST.
My experience has been: they type the full price (with GST) so that it displays on the screen but don't actually process anything. In other words: you think you're paying GST when actually they don't register the sale. That way, GST is pure profit for them.
This is part of the problem I explained when it comes to GST - it encourages black market activity which Harper's tax cut would lessen.
The small business tax cut also helps us in this arena.
Okay. Enough seriousness.
Frequent a few local corner stores. Purchase something - a pack of gum. See if they actually punch the pre-GST price in and let the register calculate the GST.
My experience has been: they type the full price (with GST) so that it displays on the screen but don't actually process anything. In other words: you think you're paying GST when actually they don't register the sale. That way, GST is pure profit for them.
This is part of the problem I explained when it comes to GST - it encourages black market activity which Harper's tax cut would lessen.
The small business tax cut also helps us in this arena.
Okay. Enough seriousness.
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
Liberal Deep-Throat Tells All: Upcoming Promises
I am in Amarillo, Texas today. Clearly, an unlikely place to run into a Grit power-broker. Still, as I went to get my rental car, a man in the shadows by a concrete column coughed loud enough to draw my attention.
Chuckercanuck: (like a good Canadian) Yes, hello? Are you having some trouble that I can help you with?
Stranger in the Shadows: (in a gruff whisper) Chuckercanuck?
Chuckercanuck is baffled. Only a handful of people know his true identity. He knew immediately that this coughing stranger must be powerful and well-connected.
Chuckercanuck: Maybe.
Stranger: Don't play games with me, lad! I didn't travel to god-damned Texas to have you pretend you aren't Chuckercanuck.
Chuckercanuck: Fine. Its me. Who are you?
Stranger: None of your business and if you want to start your car without fearing the worst - you won't ask!
Chuckercanuck knew that the car-bomb reference meant this stranger was Liberal backroom boy. No doubt.
Chuckercanuck: What do you want with me?
At this question, the stranger began a rambling soliloquy that I share with you verbatim.
Stranger: The friggin' Martino family thinks I can be put to pasture like a god-damned castrated bull. Bull! I'll show them. Besides, I'm warming to Harper. The guy looks so good with kids, I'd put him in charge of running a government-funded daycare in a heartbeat. This is their kiss-of-death. Tell everyone, Chuckercanuck, tell everyone. Here's what the Liberals plan to spring on Canada by way of election promises:
1) They aren't just going to promise daycare funding for a decade - they're going to fund it for a century!!!
2) They aren't just going to fix health care for a generation - they will fix it for eternity!
3) Not only are they going to support cities big time - they plan to support cities that don't even exist yet - like New Halifax and Gritsburgh.
4) They aren't going to stop at extra immigration monies. They plan to drop a cool billion on emigration!
5) They're not just going to get tough with the U.S., they plan to get tough with New Zealand, Austria and Honduras!
The CPC better get their act together. The Martino family is oozing promises that are going to make voters sing...
Chuckercanuck: (like a good Canadian) Yes, hello? Are you having some trouble that I can help you with?
Stranger in the Shadows: (in a gruff whisper) Chuckercanuck?
Chuckercanuck is baffled. Only a handful of people know his true identity. He knew immediately that this coughing stranger must be powerful and well-connected.
Chuckercanuck: Maybe.
Stranger: Don't play games with me, lad! I didn't travel to god-damned Texas to have you pretend you aren't Chuckercanuck.
Chuckercanuck: Fine. Its me. Who are you?
Stranger: None of your business and if you want to start your car without fearing the worst - you won't ask!
Chuckercanuck knew that the car-bomb reference meant this stranger was Liberal backroom boy. No doubt.
Chuckercanuck: What do you want with me?
At this question, the stranger began a rambling soliloquy that I share with you verbatim.
Stranger: The friggin' Martino family thinks I can be put to pasture like a god-damned castrated bull. Bull! I'll show them. Besides, I'm warming to Harper. The guy looks so good with kids, I'd put him in charge of running a government-funded daycare in a heartbeat. This is their kiss-of-death. Tell everyone, Chuckercanuck, tell everyone. Here's what the Liberals plan to spring on Canada by way of election promises:
1) They aren't just going to promise daycare funding for a decade - they're going to fund it for a century!!!
2) They aren't just going to fix health care for a generation - they will fix it for eternity!
3) Not only are they going to support cities big time - they plan to support cities that don't even exist yet - like New Halifax and Gritsburgh.
4) They aren't going to stop at extra immigration monies. They plan to drop a cool billion on emigration!
5) They're not just going to get tough with the U.S., they plan to get tough with New Zealand, Austria and Honduras!
The CPC better get their act together. The Martino family is oozing promises that are going to make voters sing...
Nazis, Nazis Everywhere
Lapierre thinks Duceppe’s articulated desire to defeat the Liberals in every riding in Quebec is “a bit Nazi-like.”
Hmmmm. Here is the Jean Lapierre List of Nazi-Like Activity:
10. Defeat Liberals in every riding in Quebec.
9. Order toasted hot-dogs, hold the mustard, with your poutine.
8. Canvas in Mr. Lapierre’s riding.
7. Sing Shania Twain tunes around a campfire.
6. Mention the word “Gomery”.
5. Go golfing in August, unless its at a Paul Martin fundraiser tournament that the stranger Claude Boulay organizes.
4. Remind Mr. Lapierre that he founded this Nazi-Like Party.
3. Suggest there is something untoward about Liberal organizers fearing that bombs have been planted in their car.
2. Purchase hard liquor in Cornwall where the LCBO charges 20% less than the SAQ.
1. Set up a national child care program – dubbed “Liberal Youth” – in order to get Canadians working for a greater Canada. Mr. Dryden: are you listening?
Also, here’s a helpful orientation guide to the Liberal Party’s views of its opponents.
1. Gilles Duceppe is Hitler. The Bloc are the Nazis.
2. Stephen “threat to the rights and freedoms of all Canadians” is Osama Bin Laden. The Conservatives are Al-Quaeda.
3. Jack Layton is Pol Pot. The NDP are the Khmer Rouge.
But Paul Martin is old yeller, Mr. Roper and Uncle Jesse from the Dukes of Hazzard wrapped up in one, big cuddly bundle.
Hmmmm. Here is the Jean Lapierre List of Nazi-Like Activity:
10. Defeat Liberals in every riding in Quebec.
9. Order toasted hot-dogs, hold the mustard, with your poutine.
8. Canvas in Mr. Lapierre’s riding.
7. Sing Shania Twain tunes around a campfire.
6. Mention the word “Gomery”.
5. Go golfing in August, unless its at a Paul Martin fundraiser tournament that the stranger Claude Boulay organizes.
4. Remind Mr. Lapierre that he founded this Nazi-Like Party.
3. Suggest there is something untoward about Liberal organizers fearing that bombs have been planted in their car.
2. Purchase hard liquor in Cornwall where the LCBO charges 20% less than the SAQ.
1. Set up a national child care program – dubbed “Liberal Youth” – in order to get Canadians working for a greater Canada. Mr. Dryden: are you listening?
Also, here’s a helpful orientation guide to the Liberal Party’s views of its opponents.
1. Gilles Duceppe is Hitler. The Bloc are the Nazis.
2. Stephen “threat to the rights and freedoms of all Canadians” is Osama Bin Laden. The Conservatives are Al-Quaeda.
3. Jack Layton is Pol Pot. The NDP are the Khmer Rouge.
But Paul Martin is old yeller, Mr. Roper and Uncle Jesse from the Dukes of Hazzard wrapped up in one, big cuddly bundle.
Martin Wins the Foreing Endorsement Game
AA Flight #1431
Still far enough from Texas that the theme to “Dallas” hasn’t invaded my head as it will when the pilot announces our descent into DFW.
Quite a number of blogs (all, of course, Liberals hacks shilling for the man) have made the point that W would be thrilled with a Harper victory in Canada. The logic, of course, is that whatever makes W happy is bad – very bad – and Canadians’ allergic reaction to the 43rd president will steer them away from Harper.
So, off to Goggle I went to see what the aspirations of other world leaders are for the coming Canadian election. Do I have to tell you the world is riveted by this election?
Vladamir Putin hopes for a Martin win. Putin and Martin both agree that ever-increasing power in the hands of a single individual makes a country strong, strong, strong.
Khaddafy of Lybia pines for a Martin landslide. He and Martin became bestest of friends in a tent outside Tripoli during Martin’s one bilateral summit of note. Why Lybia? We’re still wondering…
Hugo Chavez hopes Layton wins the “big enchilada” as he calls it. La Tempo della
Caracas quotes him as quipping, “if I had the oilsands, man, I’d stick to the Yankees just like Layton wants. Of course, I’m not too fond of soft wood – my wood is rock hard.”
Martin scores another foreign endorsement from Bashir Assad of Syria. Said Assad,
“if the Liberals lose, my jail’s are going to go empty!”
Castro, surprisingly, backs Harper. For some strange reason, he can’t get over the coup Martin orchestrated against Chretien. Hey Fidel, relax! We only topple elected leaders.
Kim Jong-Il – that rapscallion – backs the Green Party. A quote I found from the Pyong-Yang Daily Telegraph (which is actually how it is transmitted): “this is a damn long election by Canadian standards and what is it going to change? Nothing!”
So, if I tally up the count:
Martin - 3 foreign endorsements
Layton – 1 endorsement
Harper – 2 endorsements (oddly, W and Castro? Politics make strange bedfellows indeed),.
If this is any indicator, looks like Martin has this one in the bag.
Still far enough from Texas that the theme to “Dallas” hasn’t invaded my head as it will when the pilot announces our descent into DFW.
Quite a number of blogs (all, of course, Liberals hacks shilling for the man) have made the point that W would be thrilled with a Harper victory in Canada. The logic, of course, is that whatever makes W happy is bad – very bad – and Canadians’ allergic reaction to the 43rd president will steer them away from Harper.
So, off to Goggle I went to see what the aspirations of other world leaders are for the coming Canadian election. Do I have to tell you the world is riveted by this election?
Vladamir Putin hopes for a Martin win. Putin and Martin both agree that ever-increasing power in the hands of a single individual makes a country strong, strong, strong.
Khaddafy of Lybia pines for a Martin landslide. He and Martin became bestest of friends in a tent outside Tripoli during Martin’s one bilateral summit of note. Why Lybia? We’re still wondering…
Hugo Chavez hopes Layton wins the “big enchilada” as he calls it. La Tempo della
Caracas quotes him as quipping, “if I had the oilsands, man, I’d stick to the Yankees just like Layton wants. Of course, I’m not too fond of soft wood – my wood is rock hard.”
Martin scores another foreign endorsement from Bashir Assad of Syria. Said Assad,
“if the Liberals lose, my jail’s are going to go empty!”
Castro, surprisingly, backs Harper. For some strange reason, he can’t get over the coup Martin orchestrated against Chretien. Hey Fidel, relax! We only topple elected leaders.
Kim Jong-Il – that rapscallion – backs the Green Party. A quote I found from the Pyong-Yang Daily Telegraph (which is actually how it is transmitted): “this is a damn long election by Canadian standards and what is it going to change? Nothing!”
So, if I tally up the count:
Martin - 3 foreign endorsements
Layton – 1 endorsement
Harper – 2 endorsements (oddly, W and Castro? Politics make strange bedfellows indeed),.
If this is any indicator, looks like Martin has this one in the bag.
Saturday, December 03, 2005
Tory Takeover of Canadian Film Sweepestakes - Delayed
Not often when I have to agree with Paul Martin on something - this time, its election timing.
Due to the election, the screenwriting contest we have organized is delayed until after the vote.
The organizing committee, headed up by the beatnik poet Lager Cranfield, decided the focus for now should be beating the Liberals.
Coming soon -
Campaign Quebec: The Struggle for a Tory Sweep
(it is possible)
Due to the election, the screenwriting contest we have organized is delayed until after the vote.
The organizing committee, headed up by the beatnik poet Lager Cranfield, decided the focus for now should be beating the Liberals.
Coming soon -
Campaign Quebec: The Struggle for a Tory Sweep
(it is possible)
Duceppe Shoots, Finland Scores!
Duceppe's idea is that Quebec, while in Canada, would field its own national hockey team (etc.).
Right now, things look like this:
Top 6 Hockey Teams in the World
1 - Canada
2 - Russia
3 - United States
4 - Czech Republic
5 - Finland
6 - Sweden
Should Duceppe win the election and form a government, the rankings would become:
1 - Russia
2 - United States
3 - Czech Republic
4 - Canada
5 - Finland
6 - Quebec
Yes, the solution to Quebec's challenges is to break away from the best hockey team in the world for the glory of being number 6. Funny how those separatists seem to love losing so much.
Right now, things look like this:
Top 6 Hockey Teams in the World
1 - Canada
2 - Russia
3 - United States
4 - Czech Republic
5 - Finland
6 - Sweden
Should Duceppe win the election and form a government, the rankings would become:
1 - Russia
2 - United States
3 - Czech Republic
4 - Canada
5 - Finland
6 - Quebec
Yes, the solution to Quebec's challenges is to break away from the best hockey team in the world for the glory of being number 6. Funny how those separatists seem to love losing so much.
Friday, December 02, 2005
Liberals Now Love Kim Campbell
Hilarious to see so many Liberal bloggers quoting Kim Campbell.
Isn't she the lady who told Canada they couldn't elect a man with a mangled face
as Prime Minister?
Now, you cling to her every word. (Just like you're quoting the Fraser Institute?)
Isn't she the lady who told Canada they couldn't elect a man with a mangled face
as Prime Minister?
Now, you cling to her every word. (Just like you're quoting the Fraser Institute?)
Thursday, December 01, 2005
Some Questions for Economists
The CBC tells me that "economists are dumping on the Harper plan".
(Aside, they dumped on his platform budget in 2004 until the Liberals adopted it in February 2005).
Let me ask some questions to these "economists":
"Are you Jim Stanford?" (okay, just checking. I know he's the only economist in the whole world who's expert opinion has a political slant - the rest of you are objective.)
"Do you work for a bank? Does your bank want the Liberals to get merger legislation through?" (never, never would they use their coveted, expert opinion to advance their own causes... never, never).
"Are you allowed on planes or do you generally get so drunk, you cause a fracas?" (here's where Liberals get mad at me - "no fair, reminding us of that incident")
"Are you an academic? Are you and your colleagues unionized?"
Sorry. I'll leave this alone now.
(Aside, they dumped on his platform budget in 2004 until the Liberals adopted it in February 2005).
Let me ask some questions to these "economists":
"Are you Jim Stanford?" (okay, just checking. I know he's the only economist in the whole world who's expert opinion has a political slant - the rest of you are objective.)
"Do you work for a bank? Does your bank want the Liberals to get merger legislation through?" (never, never would they use their coveted, expert opinion to advance their own causes... never, never).
"Are you allowed on planes or do you generally get so drunk, you cause a fracas?" (here's where Liberals get mad at me - "no fair, reminding us of that incident")
"Are you an academic? Are you and your colleagues unionized?"
Sorry. I'll leave this alone now.
5% of Everything You Always Wanted to Know about Taxes
"All Taxes Are Bad." - Stephen Harper.
In Canada, its sexy to be stupid with numbers. Ask anyone who hosts a show on the CBC - have a number bigger than say, 72,199 and the CBC host is allowed to pretend that its contemplating infinity. The CBC hosts job is to be every man. Personally, they all can count. They just think you are dumber than a post and barely grasp your grocery bill.
Helpful aren't they?
Andrew Coyne says the GST reduction idea is very stupid as a policy. He'll probably devote some more time to it in a column. Like you, dear reader, Andrew is an admirable beacon in the sea of human thinking - but he's wrong on this.
Let me explain. All Taxes Are Bad. No matter how you tax it, you will distort society in some negative way. Governments everywhere choose how they raise revenue. They have to do it anyway, but have great flexibility in how they do so. A posteri, we discover the negative impacts and then can determine whether the negative impacts justify collecting revenue someway's else.
Taxes Are Not Spending. Frozen-headed Liberals think that saying "all taxes are bad" means that "all spending is bad." Logic 101 anyone? Spending is necessary. Where it isn't necessary, we have chosen to spend on programs that we feel maximize the happiness of our citizens. Some of it is bad spending. Some of it is good spending. Good spending happens when our objectives are met or exceeded.
So. On to the GST.
None of us are rich like Paul Martin. We don't earn a living running a major shipping business. As such, we don't have access to the tax shelters that such companies do. We can't hide our income. The government collects it before we ever see it.
But spending? New roof? Used car? Cash-only transactions? The Liberals are going to tell us that we can't engage in cash only transactions?
Right you see my point before I made. Consumption taxes are the easiest taxes to screw. The Liberals have created a nation of shoulder-shruggers who say to themselves, "fuck them! they did it to me - what do I owe them? Give me a family doctor - at least - $41 billion later."
Reducing the GST lessens the incentive to trade in the black market. (We have all seen this with sin taxes). As Mr. Harper increases the honesty and transparency of government, he is setting policies that will increase the honesty and transparency of the citizenry.
In Canada, its sexy to be stupid with numbers. Ask anyone who hosts a show on the CBC - have a number bigger than say, 72,199 and the CBC host is allowed to pretend that its contemplating infinity. The CBC hosts job is to be every man. Personally, they all can count. They just think you are dumber than a post and barely grasp your grocery bill.
Helpful aren't they?
Andrew Coyne says the GST reduction idea is very stupid as a policy. He'll probably devote some more time to it in a column. Like you, dear reader, Andrew is an admirable beacon in the sea of human thinking - but he's wrong on this.
Let me explain. All Taxes Are Bad. No matter how you tax it, you will distort society in some negative way. Governments everywhere choose how they raise revenue. They have to do it anyway, but have great flexibility in how they do so. A posteri, we discover the negative impacts and then can determine whether the negative impacts justify collecting revenue someway's else.
Taxes Are Not Spending. Frozen-headed Liberals think that saying "all taxes are bad" means that "all spending is bad." Logic 101 anyone? Spending is necessary. Where it isn't necessary, we have chosen to spend on programs that we feel maximize the happiness of our citizens. Some of it is bad spending. Some of it is good spending. Good spending happens when our objectives are met or exceeded.
So. On to the GST.
None of us are rich like Paul Martin. We don't earn a living running a major shipping business. As such, we don't have access to the tax shelters that such companies do. We can't hide our income. The government collects it before we ever see it.
But spending? New roof? Used car? Cash-only transactions? The Liberals are going to tell us that we can't engage in cash only transactions?
Right you see my point before I made. Consumption taxes are the easiest taxes to screw. The Liberals have created a nation of shoulder-shruggers who say to themselves, "fuck them! they did it to me - what do I owe them? Give me a family doctor - at least - $41 billion later."
Reducing the GST lessens the incentive to trade in the black market. (We have all seen this with sin taxes). As Mr. Harper increases the honesty and transparency of government, he is setting policies that will increase the honesty and transparency of the citizenry.
